Tuesday, January 5, 2010

10 down...15 to go.

I would like to preface this post by stating that for the last 2 seasons, three if you count the one that is currently underway, I have watched the "Bachelor/Bachelorette" seasons with my bestest gal pal. In an effort to protect the names of the innocent, I will refer to her from here on out in my blog as "Lady". So, Lady and I got together around 8, and the "most dramatic season yet" commenced! Please bear with me, and know that I really harbor no ill will towards any of the "contestants" this season, but being a resident of Texas myself, and living within stalking distance, kinda flawed my view of several of these women. Whether my opinion is flawed by a twinge of jealousy, or by Lady's husband who kept pointing out who the women resembled in real life, I'll never be quite sure, but here is a brief recap of the happenings on the show last night...according to me.

First: There is a very large majority that must not feel the need to wear undies anymore. I mean seriously, girls...if you are going to be on national television, you may want to help victoria keep her secret. I'm just sayin'! Don't get me wrong, I know that in this day in age, it is very hard (especially when you have been well endowed in certain areas) for you to keep your northern mountains covered, but once you are giving a tour of your southern valley...NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT!!! So, Ashleigh...cover it up next week, okay darlin'?

Second: Can you spell drama? I can: M-I-C-H-E-L-L-E. See! I should be in some kind of spelling Bee, I AM THE CHAMPION...MY FRIENDS! Anywhoo...seriously, crying on the first night, because after 3 hours of being there, you had not had any one on one time with the guy who has 25 women vyeing for his attention? I see your point...why didn't he just propose to you right there? Well, maybe he is like the lovely Kathryn, in all her purple tutu glory, who has a "pretend fiance". I mean, you can't expect a guy to commit to an actual living breathing organic girl when he's got a delusion on the side, right? Ay yi yi!

Third: Too forward, or just downright inappropriate...you decide. First, Vienna, who was "agressive" to say the least, in her one on one time with Jake. Beginning with her placing his hand on her heart to feel how fast it was beating, and ending with forcing him to kiss her leg where she had been hit with a softball or something, kinda seemed a little more than "playful" to me. But, this even seemed benign compared to Channey's comment in Cambodian...Oh. My. Gosh! Apparently Jake had no interest in landing his plane on her landing strip, because he sent her packing.

Lastly: No green swim trunks? I have to admit, the glutten for punishment that I am, was a little saddended when E.D. showed up in a suit as opposed to his less than flattering, practically underpants, swimwear. I still don't get why he and "Jill" showed up there...nobody ever listens to the "friends" that come to "help". What's the point?! After all, who did they say he should send home? (I'll give you a hint...her name starts with Michelle) and who didn't he send home? DUH!!!

So, here are mine and Lady's predictions: Gia will be the one who the scandal is centered around, because one of us claims she looks like a crack whore, but I will not name names. We really like Ali to take it all.

Tenley get's my vote for the wierdest name this season, since Channey got eliminated so early on. Ella seems like a swell girl, and also gets props for being the only single mom on the show who has admitted to having children thus far. You go girl! (I'm pretty sure I can't pull that off, can I?)

Now, since I'm sure the suspense is eating you alive, I will reveal my Psycho girl of the week award. Drumroll please.........................


Wear your crown proudly girl...you earned it!

No comments: