Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Big Reveal!

Remember 2 weeks ago, when I announced this month's "Unfinished Project Closet" goal? Well, as promised, I'm linking up with Xazmin to reveal what I did with Mod Podge to improve my opinion of my mantle. Before I show you what I did, I just wanted to say that sometimes, it is a real pain in the rear to have a creative mind. I see a project in my head, that theoretically should be super easy, and should look flawlessly beautiful. Now, my project turned out, in my opinion beautiful...but it is most certainly NOT flawless. Seriously, guys, DO NOT enlanrge the picture and zoom in too closely, or you will see all the bubbles, and imperfections, but from certain angles, it looks just how I wanted it to look. Also, please pay no attention to the fat girl in the picture. That girl has since lost 15 pounds, and is much less, shall we say, robust. Without further ado, here is what I did.

First, I took a family picture, and had my husband (a photo shop whiz) blow it up, but break it down to twelve 8x10 photos. We turned them black and white, and printed them out on our printer. (Sorry, I'm totally a novice to the whole "tutorial in pictures" kind of thing, or I so would have taken pictures of every single step.)

Then, I trimmed down the pictures, from 8x10's to 7.5 x 9.5, by taking a quarter of an inch off of each side.

Then, I gathered my materials.

I took two poster board size pieces of foam board, and cut them down to 12-7.5" x 9.5" pieces. I cut 3 pieces of 12x12 scrapbook paper down to be big enough to cover the edges of the foam board. (I did this to try to make the picture look like it was actually done on canvas, as opposed to cheap foam board.) I applied the scrapbook paper to the edges first...

I applied the longer pieces to the long sides first, by putting Mod Podge on the paper, and then placing the foam board onto it. I folded the ends up, and then folded it up like a present. After both long sides were done, I put the shorter pieces on the shorter sides, that were not already covered. When I was done, it looked a little something like this:

Notice, that I did not make any effort to make it perfectly straight. It doesn't have to be since the front is going to be covered in a picture.

I did not take pictures of the next step, because this is where I got frustrated, and almost gave up on the idea completely. I put a LOT of Mod Podge on the front, smoothed a picture onto it, then sealed the crap out of it by slathering the whole thing in mod podge. Problem was, I ended up with a TON of bubbles.

I repeated this process 12 times, until my entire "picture" was done. Then, I had Roon hang it, and we threw on the vinyl. When all was said and done, it looked like this:

Right now I'm trying to convince myself that the bubbles make it look more "textured" and that they give the piece character. My perfectionism is telling me that it is not nearly as cool as what I had pictured in my head. Is anything really as cool as we picture in our heads? Overall, I like it. I especially like that it cost less than $10 to make, so I don't feel like I have to keep it the same way all the time, if I don't want to. What do ya'll think?

Friday, February 26, 2010

Is Stress Good For the Complexion?

Hello friends! First of all, I have to say that a flogging is probably in order. I have had so much stuff thrown at me over the last week, that my communication with my wonderful bloggy friends has suffered. I promise...I'll be better after Sunday...I hope!
So here's the trillion dollar question. What is it about stress that makes you break out? Seriously...I can go from not even close to flawless skin, to looking like a connect the dot picture after 4 days of mild to moderate stress. In an effort to save my sanity, and my complexion, I will now attempt to look on the bright side of life.

  • I recently learned some disturbing news. The person who entrusted me with this information swore me to secrecy, making me promise to tell noone. Not even Roon. As if the news itself weren't stressful enough, keeping the information from Roon is making it worse. The bright side? Since Roon knows that I know something he doesn't, he has been uber nice to me in an attempt to get me to spill the beans. It's like birthday week...only better

  • My internet went down for a few hours yesterday morning. The bright side? I got to see Roon at lunch time, so he could fix it. Plus, I got to use my morning computer time to perfect my solitaire playing skills. Yukon 3 deck...I own you!!!

  • I had a migraine headache all day yesterday. Thankfully, it didn't get really bad until about 7:00 in the evening, and since I didn't feel well, I had an excuse to just cuddle on the couch with Boo. Much better than housework, I must say. Plus, I got to take the GOOD drugs before lights out at 8:30. I heart you, Darvocet!

  • I was asked to speak in church this coming Sunday. Normally, the idea of public speaking with only a week to prepare would send me into a panic. However, I'm taking a very "Pollyanna" approach to the whole thing, and just thanking my lucky stars that it will most likely be a whole year before they ask me to do it again. Even longer, if I do a bad job!

On a happy note, my Mod Podge Mania project is coming along nicely, even though I hit a snag or two along the way. I'm really excited to reveal it on Sunday if for no other reason than it will mean that my talk is over. Let's just hope that my procrastination skills will soon be replaced by my "works good under pressure" skills, or I may be in trouble!

Free Money

As a preface to this post, I wanted to say thank you to all my wonderful new friends who were so concerned last Friday that I wasn't getting to go on a date with my hubby. I am happy to report that we get to go out on our date tonight, as long as nothing comes up, and it has been rumored that I might get dinner AND a movie...dare to dream!

I just love Fridays! I always have (for obvious reasons) but I have started to love them even more since I started linking up with one of my favorite people, MiMi, for her F Bomb Friday! I had such a hard time deciding which of two stories to tell this week, but this one won the coin toss, so here it goes...

When I was 16, I opened my first checking account. After I got married, Roon and I switched my account into a joint checking account, and everything was happy. A year or so later, our bank was bought out by a larger, more useless bank, so we naturally were forced to switch. No problems showed up for about a year. Slowly but surely, this bank (who shall remain nameless so I don't get sued for slander) climbed to the top of my "corporations I'm likely to boycot" list. Poor customer service, and just a general "I don't have to care" attitude, made this bank my ultimate nemesis. So, Roon and I finally decided we had enough.
Turns out that switching banks is a pretty major deal. Of course, we have a checking account, 5 saving's accounts (one for us, and one for each of our kids), a credit card, a car loan, and a mortgage all through this good for nothing bank.
After some careful research (okay let's be honest...after looking at two other banks on the internet, and figuring nothing could be worse than what we were currently dealing with) we found our Utopia. When D-day arrived, we put on our "Sears best" (as the Brady Bunch would say) and headed to the bank. After an hour or so, we were all set, minus the car loan (which will be paid off in March, so it wasn't worth the hassle) and the mortgage (which you know how long that can take...).
A few days later, we got our new debit cards. YEAH!!!
A day or so later, we got our new credit cards. This is where the swear words come into play...
I was confused as to why our credit cards came in separate envelopes. Our debit cards came in the same envelope, why not our credit cards? Then I noticed that each envelope was addressed to only one of us, instead of addressed "jointly". I opened them both (Federal offense, maybe, but tell me that you don't open your husband's mail...) and realized that one card said their limit was higher than the other. How in the heck could this happen?! Then I remembered the conversation with the banker...
Him: "Do you BOTH want a credit card?"
Me: (Thinking, "of course, why would I want my husband to be the only one with access to the credit card?") Yes, please.

He wasn't asking about the physical CARD, he was asking about the ACCOUNT. Not sure why he would assume that we wanted separate accounts, when we obviously didn't have separate accounts before, but whatever, genius! As expected, when I called to activate my account, and I talked with the nice lady about the mix up, she said that we would have to close both accounts, and open a new one, or close mine, and have me added on to Roon's account. And of course, she couldn't even let me activate his account. She had to talk to him (who was sitting right next to me) to activate his account. Well, that's convenient! Thanks for making our lives easier new bank!!!
Maybe I should keep my money in my mattress...

P.S. When all is said and done, I think what we have decided to do is keep my low limit (of course it's low limit, according to corporate America, I don't have a JOB) card and link it to our checking for "overdraft protection", and then add me onto Roon's account so I can have access. Just figures that we would switch banks to avoid the headaches, and encounter a problem within a week...Holy Moley!!!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

I'm Off To See The Wizard...A Lot!

I have a love/hate relationship with my DVR. I absolutely LOVE that I never have to miss an episode of my favorite shows (The Bachelor, Grey's Anatomy, Big Bang Theory, 24, etc.) but I HATE that I can never miss an episode of my favorite shows. Allow me to explain...
Ever since I was in middle school, my sister and I have had a steady relationship with Oprah. Every weekday at 4, we would tune into her. It became a habit. This habit has continued through my adult life. Am I an Oprah fanatic? No. I did not stop eating beef during that whole fiasco, I did not vote for Obama, and I was one of her biggest critics when she was trying to pull off the "Tina Turner" look. Come on, she wasn't fooling anyone! However, I have been a loyal watcher of her show for so long that I couldn't help but set a timer for her show. Then Dr. Oz got his own show. I loved watching Oprah on Dr. Oz days because you could learn so much from him. Perhaps I felt a connection to him because he's a heart surgeon, and you should know how special heart specialists are to me. Naturally, when his show started, I set a timer for his show as well, because after all, he would no longer be a recurring guest on Oprah. I used to watch Dr. Phil for this exact reason...but that's a whole other post.
I had no way of knowing how out of control it would get! Have I mentioned that I have 4 children? I have no time to sit down and watch Oprah or Dr. Oz on a regular basis! Not to mention the fact that for some reason he has 2 shows on a day. So, what happens? They sit, and collect digital dust, waiting for me to panic that there won't be room for the newest episode of "Lost", and give in and have a marathon (and by marathon I mean there will be no fewer than 30 shows recorded when I decide to watch them). Why not just delete them, you ask? Because I'm anal. Maybe it's the obedient kid in me, but I feel guilt deleting a show I haven't seen (I also can't watch them out of order, even if a show is boring and doesn't apply to me at all, but that's a whole other story for a post about my idiosyncracies). After all, it could be the show that saves my life, right? I mean, at least that's what the good doctor says at the beginning of every episode. Must be true, right? So I watch. Every. Episode. I learn that my powder makeup will most likely kill me 20 years down the road when it may or may not cause irreversible lung damage like those of coal miners. I learn that to prevent frostbite, one should wear wool socks over top of cotton socks, and that mittens are better than gloves. Very useful information by the way. I mean, yesterday the temperature got down to about 40, and I was feeling downright hypothermic!
But I have a confession.
At the end of most of his shows, Dr. Oz will introduce a new exercise routine. I do not watch these. Oh, I did at first, and then I realized that while planning these segments, he and his producers make a few too many assumptions. Allow me to ellaborate.
  1. Exercise Balls: He's assuming any of us are coordinated enough to not roll away when we're trying to do crunches on said "gym equipment". No thanks!
  2. Dance Routines: He's assuming those of us watching have any measurable sense of rhythm. I do not.
  3. "Lifestyle workouts": Even when he had the "squeeze it in" exercise lady on, who's doctrine includes doing "vacuum lunges" or "laundry squats" he made the assumption that I vacuum or do the laundry. Ummm, excuse me, but how would combining two things that I hate (exercising and housework) make me more motivated to do it? I don't think so!

The final straw was when I saw them do an entire exercise routine on roller skates. That's just what I need. To have to explain to an emergency room physician why someone who trips over her own feet on occasion, would attempt such an outlandish (and let's face it, dangerous) exercise regimine.

I think I'll just stick to the Wii, and eating donuts while watching Dr. Oz give diet tips. Mmmm donuts....

By the way...have ya'll ever heard the old adage about "assuming" things? As you probably know, it goes: "Don't assume. It makes an A$$ out of U and ME. My steady boyfriend my senior year of high school always got it wrong. He said: "Don't assume. It makes an A$$ out of U and SUME, and Sume doesn't like it." I wish I were kidding...

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

If All Else Fails...Hit Below The Belt.

It's Tuesday! I know that many of my followers do not watch the Bachelor, so don't worry...I. am. here. for. you. Next week is the finale, and I would be a lot more excited about it, had I not stumbled onto a spoiler blog that announced the winner. Don't worry, I'm not going to tell, but the anticipation is usually the best part, so to know who wins, whether or not I like her, kinda defeats the purpose of watching. But don't worry! I most certainly will, if for no other reason than it is like a train wreck, and I can't take my eyes off it, no matter how much I might want to.
So, last night was "The Women Tell All" and while this is usually my favorite part, I found it completely lacking in inspiration for a blog post. I thought that the whole montage of "bachelor reunion" parties (and by parties I mean...sexcapades) was WAAAYYY too long. It completely bothered me that certain "winners" were at those reunions. Come on! I thought this was supposed to be a support group for the people who left "broken hearted". You were not broken hearted! You WON!

So, whatever, moving on...

I was glad that Elizabeth agreed with the rest of the country about how stupid her "games" were of refusing to kiss Jake until she was the last girl standing. But unfortunately, the ownership of wrongdoings ended with her.

Michelle, for example. You all may recall back to when she was on the season, and she was a major subject of drama and crazy. If not, you can read all about all of the past season by clicking here. Michelle adamantly denied being even the least bit emotionally unstable, and also denied her need for a therapist. When several of the women called her on it, she even went so far as to say that "to me, it's not the true way to find love. I don't feel like you can fall in love with somebody through this process." However, do you think she would have had the same opinion had there been a different outcome for her? I submit that then she would have been the biggest advocate for the process, had that been the case. And to all those eligible bachelors out there just beyond excited that Jake let her go, you should know straight from her mouth that "I am who I am, and I'm always going to be myself wherever I am, in any situation". Hear that? She's a whole lot of crazy, and she's always gonna be that way. Come and get 'er!

The show did an excellent job of stretching out the whole Rozlyn drama too. I mean, they started out by having the women tell what they knew, and then an hour later, they brought Rozlyn out, made the girls repeat what they had told him, and then allowed her to react. Here is where I had a problem. She swore on her child's life that the things the girls were saying were lies. Who does that?! I felt that was completely inappropriate, and I hope that she can live with herself. The funniest part, was the way Chris Harrison talked to her. The quote from the movie "Goonies" comes to mind: "I feel like I'm babysitting except I'm not getting paid." Of course, Chris was, in fact, being paid, but I felt like he was talking to a disobedient nursery school child when he was trying to get her to admit to the things she had done wrong with the producer. She even went so far as to blame the entire controversy on the fact that the show wouldn't let her call her son. After several minutes of back and forth conversation, my absolute favorite quote of the entire season came into play...
"I have kids. and often times what I tell my son is when he is going off on an elaborate story about unicorns and magicians and stuff, I sit him down and I say...son, isn't the simplest story the truth? So, when I look at what's happened, one day it's about your son, the other day it's just a fabricated story, and now it's about...I'm not even sure what it's about. I'm confused because all that this had to do with was your inappropriate physical relationship with our producer." -Chris Harrison

Then the claws came out! Not only did she accuse every woman who witnessed some of the inappropriate behavior of lying, but when Chris talked about the producer, and how sad many of the staffers were to see him go, Rozlyn said, and I quote "that's news to him, especially when you were hitting on his wife in New Zealand. He thought that was crazy." Talk about a below the belt sucker punch! She should be the next ultimate fighter...really. I thought Chris's head was just going to pop right off from the steam I saw coming out his ears. None of the things she brought up had anything to do with anything, and if she thought that would make her more endearing to the public... She. Was. WRONG!

So there you have it. Sorry this post is seriously lame. I will try to do better next week!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Like Indiana Jones!

Remember on Friday, when I told you I had a doozy of a thing happen to me on Thursday, that I would eventually find time to tell you? Well, I'm too tired and drained right now from an...interesting evening, so I'm not going to link back to it, so just scroll down if you don't remember. But, here is the story and it sure is a twosey doozy!

I've always wanted to be an explorer! I would watch "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" or read a "Choose your own Adventure" book, and dream of going to far off places, and discovering great treasure in some obscure part of the world, then I would realize that in order to do those things, I would most likely encounter spiders, snakes, or bats. Considering the fact that it makes me nervous to be locked in my own dark walk in closet, the idea of a cave filled with rabies infested vermon makes me downright sick to my stomach. Plus, I don't do well with odd food. I would probably starve to death. So, scratch that, I've NEVER wanted to be an explorer, but sometimes as a mother, I am forced to wear many different hats, and this time a fedora just happened to be one of them.
As you may recall from one of my past "dear someone" letters, Boo has developed quite the aversion to clothing. To make matters worse, or at least more interesting, she has also begun to show early signs of potty-training readiness. So, when she ran screaming into the room COMPLETELY naked, I was not at all surprised. I chased her down, wrestled her onto the floor, and playfully patted her cute little chubby bottom as I told her that ladies do NOT run around without clothes on...especially when they have friends over. (I was babysitting two of my friend's kids at the time) Only problem was...when I patted her bottom, my hand met a disgusting fate.
"BOO!!! You're not supposed to take off a poopy diaper! You can only take off the wet ones! Oh gross!!!!"
No big deal. I clean her up, get a new diaper on her, and then run upstairs to try to find what I assumed would be a poopy diaper.
Only one I could find was wet. Then I start to wonder how long she had been running around upstairs without a diaper on. Had she been diaperless the entire time I was blogging cleaning?
So, I throw on my fedora, grab my trusty toilet paper and paper towels, and head out on a little mommy scavenger hunt, which all of the kids were disturbingly willing to accompany me on.
As we searched, I began to sing: (to the tune of "we're going on a bear hunt")

We're going on a POO hunt...
I'm a little bit afraid!
There's no telling where I'll find...
The treasure of the day!

The kids were not impressed, and neither was my husband when I sang it for him later. Some people have no sense of musical brilliance!

Through the gameroom (oooh!)
Can't go over it! (can't go over it)
Can't go under it! (can't go under it)
Can't go around it! (can't go around it)
Gotta go through it! (000h!)

Repeat the above verse for every room on the second floor. I couldn't find anything anywhere! Just as I had come to the conclusion that my child must be some sort of prodigy, and had actually gone in the potty, I hear one of my babysitting charges say: "Ummm, Sym...We found where Boo Pooped." Personally, I think the reason I hadn't found it before was partly because I didn't want to find it. Yes, it needed to be found, and cleaned up properly, but I much would have preferred to have had no mess to clean up. I grabbed some T.P. so I can clean up after my daughter in the same way I cleaned up after our dog during the puppy year, and reluctantly joined my fellow explorers where X marked the spot.
I will spare you too many details and pictures (because I am so not the mom that takes pictures of poo) but to complete the story, you must know that it took two trips to the bathroom to clean it up. Apparently, while I was on my way to the bathroom the first time, Bug gets the urge to dance. Maybe he's hoping for rain, so that I may not have to drag out the Powersteamer, or maybe he had finally realized that my song was quite catchy, and he felt the need to bust a move. Whatever the reason, I'm sure you've already guessed, he danced right through the remnants of our "hunt for brown October".
Anyone want to buy a fedora?

Friday, February 19, 2010

The Problem is...I Got Excited.

Yesterday, I had a doozy of a thing happen to me, which, up until this morning, I had fully intended to share as my F-Bomb Friday moment. However, this morning, I changed my mind, when we listened to the answering machine. Don't worry, I will tell you my other story another's just too blogworthy to forget about, but I just had to vent my disappointment and frustration with ya'll this morning.

On Thursday nights, we watch my best friend Lady's son for a couple of hours so she can attend a college course. In exchange for this, she has offered to watch all 4 of my kids every couple of weeks, so Roon and I can have a date. Totally fair deal, right? I mean, she has 1 kid, I have 4. She has to use her "away time" to go sit in a boring class, while we can use our "away time" to do whatever the heck we want to. Who has the better deal here? I know, it's a hard knocks life, for us! Anyway, last night while Roon and I were cleaning up the kitchen, while the kids played, Roon brought up the idea of going on a date. He never just asks me on a date, you see he's a bit of an artist when it comes to courting.
Roon: "You think Lady would be willing to babysit?"
Me: "When?"
Roon: " somethin'."
Me: "Are you asking me on a date?"
Roon: "Yeah. Kinda."
Romantic, no? So, later that night when Lady came to get "J", she asked if we knew when we wanted to go out yet. We talked about it, and decided that Friday night (tonight) would work for everyone.
That's when I got excited! I mean, a REAL date! An honest to goodness, gas up the minivan, but leave the kids at home, DATE! YIPPEEE!!! Yes, I am extremely easy to please, in case you haven't already noticed.
This morning, we are eating breakfast, getting the kids ready for school, when I notice the light on the answering machine was blinking. I wasn't home for a couple of hours the night before, but Roon was home the whole time, so I couldn't imagine why we would have a message.
Me: "Hon, who's this message from?"
Roon: "What message?"
Me: "On the machine. Did someone call?"
Roon: "Maybe I was in the bathroom..."
We play the message, only to be reminded that Roon has a church assignment tonight, and will in fact, be standing me up.
How did I not know about this? Well, I really blame myself. You see, I was right there when Roon signed up for his assignment days, so I should have written them down somewhere. After all, it was my responsibility, being the only one in the house who knows how to operate a calendar.
Way to get my hopes up there, Casanova! What the Heck?!

Now, if you're up for a knee slappin' good time, head on over and visit MiMi at "Living in France" and link up with her to share your own tale of woe and despair. We won't laugh at you...forever, at least!

Thursday, February 18, 2010


Dear head cold,'s been a month. Why the need to stick around and make my life miserable? Granted, it's kind of fun trying to set a world record for the most boxes of tissues used by one person in a single month, but enough is enough. My "muffin top" is coming back with a vengeance, because when you are unable to breathe through your nose, you are less likely to exercise. Plus...I miss the taste of food. No, the lack thereof has not slowed down my consumption of junk food, but I would really like to be able to taste the aforementioned junk food, thank you!


Your reluctant and miserable host

Dear Bug,

Remember when Daddy and Mommy had that talk with you about your use of toilet paper? Well, we weren't kidding. We're talkin' a birthday cake made out of Charmin, and everything!


contemplating a second mortgage in order to support your habit.

Dear United States Postal Worker,

I'm not really sure when leaving a package in the middle of the street counted as "delivering" it, but I will be sure to return the favor at Christmas time.


You're lucky it was just books, or I would have called to complain

Dear Lady,

How I wish I could have been in class with you last night when you had to perform "gymnastics"! I'm not laughing at you...really. And I can assure you that I would NOT have brought my video camera, and posted the video on YouTube for all your friends to enjoy. I'm WAAAAY too nice for that! Just remember, this will all be worth it. Repeat after me: "It will all be worth it". Next year you will be graduating FINALLY, and I will be the loudest one in the stands cheering you on. Until then...I will laugh at the hoops you have to jump through to become an Elementary School Teacher.


You know I only tease you because I love you so darn much!
Your Biggest Fan.

Dear Shortmama,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I would sing, but you wouldn't be able to hear me all the way over in Arizona, and my voice is fading and cracking anyway, so the neighbors surely wouldn't appreciate the effort. Just remember, you're only as old as you feel, and the calories you consume on your birthday don't count...or so I've been told.


Hoping it's the best birthday EVER!

Okay, everyone! Now it's your turn to stop by and visit SHORTMAMA, link up your Dear letters with her, and wish her a happy birthday. You know you want to....

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Stamp Collecting

Have you been looking for a fun activity to do with your toddler? Well, I don't have one for you, but might I suggest an activity that your toddler may enjoy doing all by themselves? Sounds even better, right? I call this activity "Stampin' Up! After Dark". There are just a few rules to this activity. First, it MUST be done with absolutely no adult supervision whatsoever. Second, it must be done in the hours between when you are absolutely positive your child is asleep, and when they wake you in the morning for breakfast.
If you follow these simple rules, I guarantee you will be THRILLED with the results of their creative license....

This activity brought to you by the child who's parents allowed them to give away mini stamps at the Valentine party. Thanks mystery Mom!

Just in case you were wondering...the stamp is supposedly "washable" but it LIES!!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Wait...That Wasn't You?

This week on the Bachelor, the final 3 was whittled down to the final two as the girls used their skills as professional call girls to win the heart of Jake.
Can you tell I hate this part?
The "fantasy dates" have always bothered me. I guess I should start off by saying that I was a virgin bride. Like Tenley, I have only ever been with one man, and that man bought the cow before he was allowed to partake of the milk, so to speak. Not to say that I'm the morality police, because I in no way judge those that did not choose to take the same path. I have friends all along the spectrum, from "never kissed until they were told to kiss the bride" to "still cohabitating after being together for 10+ years, and having several children together". I love all my friends, and do not stand on any kind of moral high ground when it comes to their own personal feelings in regards to their personal relationships. I only know what was and is right for me.
Sleeping with someone to get a job...not right for me. That is what the final 3 always feels like to me. It's like a physical challenge on Survivor. "Okay, you've answered all the questions right, now let's see what you can, or are willing to do for the money."
Not only that, but you are basically saying that it is okay for your boyfriend to cheat on you, with your friends. Granted, Vienna doesn't really have any friends, but if she did, she basically said (by being the last girl with an overnight with Jake) "dude, it's totally okay that you have spent the last 2 days bumping uglies with those other two girls. Really, I'm okay with being sloppy thirds."
And what does this say to the poor girl (Gia) who he sent packing? Wham bam...thank you ma'am?! Sorry, you're just not flexible enough?!
I honestly thought that Tenley would have turned down the "forego your individual room" card because she had stated before how important morality was to her. Actually, what I hoped would happen, was that Jake would have been a stand up guy and not put her in that position to begin with...but whatever. I was wrong.
Don't even get me started on how mad I was that Ali didn't come back. I mean, COME ON! Last season we had to watch Ed "shorty shorts" whatshisbucket prance around on the beach as a result of Jillian letting him come back, but Jake didn't even give Ali a chance to come see him in person to state her case? That almost made me mad enough to coin the phrase the Dixie Chicks have made famous "we're ashamed to say he's from Texas" but I guess I'll give him two more weeks to redeem himself.
I have another beef with this show. Do any of ya'll remember back to the beginning when the fantasy dates all took place in different places? Not like three different hotels on the same beach, different, but one is in Hawaii, the other is in Alaska, and the last one is in Venice, kind of different. I mean, having them all take place in St. Lucia is going to make it difficult for Jake to keep them all straight. I can just see it now...
Jake: "Hey Vienna, remember that time we were in St. Lucia, and we were walking along that black sand beach, and you said that you had never been to a black sand beach before? Wasn't that so romantic?"
Vienna: "That wasn't me, and according to the video footage, that was Tenley."
Jake: "Oh...right."
Jake: "Well, remember that time when we went to the fantasy suite, and stripped down necked, and made out in the tub as the cameras filmed every minute? That's when I knew I was in love with you."
Vienna: "That, was Gia."
Jake: "I could have sworn that was you."

You see my point, no?

I want Tenley to win, or for him to send them both packing...but I don't get a vote. I'm always backing the wrong horse (heehee, I'm laughing now because Lady affectionately calls Vienna "horse face") so it's a good thing I'm not an avid gambler.
Next week is "the women tell all". I LOVE this part! It's when all the crazy comes out! Don't worry...I'll keep you posted!

Monday, February 15, 2010


Come in really close. Can you hear me? Okay good. Please don't let my kids know I'm here! I've stolen a few minutes to myself, and I don't want them to know I'm not in the shower anymore...
Please, if you don't hear from me in the next 24 hours...send reinforcements! I fear they may actually lock me in a closet somewhere, and deprive me of food, water and chocolate. I really fear for my sanity right now. Or at least, what once resembled "sanity".
Dang! I think the sound of the keys tapping has given me away. Seriously though...REINFORCEMENTS!

Friday, February 12, 2010

F Bomb Friday: Murphy's Law

As a disclaimer, I must tell you that the events I am about to describe happened more to my husband, than to myself. I was not a witness to "the event" so the best I can do is tell it exactly as he told it to me.
Monday morning was pretty laid back. Roon and I got up and exercised, kids were up and dressed in plenty of time to get to school. All was right with the world. After a few hours, I called Roon at work to ask him something. I asked how his day was going.
Roon: "Ummm, alright. I guess..."
Me: "What does that mean?"
Roon: "You want to hear something stupid?"
Me: "Does it have something to do with carpooling?"
This is probably a good time to mention that my husband occasionally gives a ride to a friend, which is fine, but this friend is not the biggest "morning person" so it usually makes Roon run late on the mornings he picks him up.
Roon: "No."
Me: "Okay, what?"
Roon: "So, I was dropping the kids off at school right? Well I pulled into the driveway just fine, I parked next to the curb, opened the car door for the kids (we have one of those push button things in our van, so you don't have to exert any amount of physical force to open the door) the kids get out, everything's fine."
Me: "I'm failing to see the stupid part."
Roon: "I haven't gotten to it yet. So, anyway, there was this teacher/aid person there (like usual) to help get the kids out of the car safely [yadda yadda yadda] and then she went to shut the door. Not really sure WHY she thought she had to close the door, I didn't need her help to open it, but she yanked on it...HARD."
Me: "And...?"
Roon: "And...she broke the handle."
Me: "Broke the handle? What does that mean?"
Roon: "She broke the handle OFF."
Me: "OFF?!"
Roon: "Yes, off. She looked kind of stunned for a second, then handed it to me, and said 'you're handle broke'."
Me: "Did she at least say she was sorry?"
Roon: "Not so much. Just handed me the handle, and walked away. I closed the door by pushing the button, and was on my way."

Seriously? Not even a "sorry I accidentally turned your car into an eyesore"?
I told Roon that I guess this meant we had to look into getting it fixed. He said "why? We don't really NEED it. We can just use the button."
Yeah, uh-huh, sure. That's gonna happen. NO WAY JOSÉ! We are not going to drive around with the van looking like that, and if the words "duct tape" escape his lips, he'd better make up the bed in the guest bedroom.

Oh wait! You haven't even heard the best part yet! We've had this van for 5 years. We've been paying for it for 5 years. Just this year, we decided to use our tax return to help pay it off faster, and we are now one payment away from paying it off (a year early, I might add) and it has apparently begun to fall apart! Dang you Murphy, and your stinkin' law!!!

I am not really a pessimistic person by nature. I am much more the "glass is half full" or "look on the bright side" kind of girl. However, I am seriously failing to see the bright side to the previous story. Perhaps you will all be more able to see it, being removed from the situation, so feel free to give me some clarity, if you feel so inclined.

Now, go visit MiMi, link up with her, and let us all laugh at your misery as you describe the things that make you go RRRRR.

Things I Heart.

Do ya'll remember way back in January, when I promised I would give you some insights into who I am? Well, in case you don't remember, you can read all about it here. It is now the 12th of the month, and since it is February, I thought what better way to celebrate Valentine's day, than to let you in on a list of things I LOVE. I hope it goes without saying that I love my family and friends, so you will not find them on the list. You will also not find my religion, or my beliefs on the list, because that seems really deep, and since Valentine's day is more of a superficial holiday, this is a superficial list of things I can't get enough of.
Here goes...somethin'.
  1. JAMES AVERY. More specifically James Avery charms. You see, Lady (who knows me better than I know myself sometimes) decided that she wanted to get me a charm bracelet for Christmas this year. But, if you know anything about the brand, you know the price tag (cha ching!) is a little steep. So, she conspired with Roon to be able to get me a bracelet and 2 charms. Needless to say, it was the PERFECT present! I wear it every day, and only take it off to exercise, and shower. Too much information? So, I am now hopelessly addicted to the charms, and have a wish list about a mile long. Some of the charms I want don't even have special meaning to me, I just think they're cute. That's good enough reason to buy them, right? Riiiight.
  2. GILMORE GIRLS. Oh how I love the Lorelai Gilmores! I have all 7 (WHY did it have to be cancelled?!) seasons on DVD, and will on occasion declare it "marathon" time, and pop one DVD in right after the other. I haven't done this since right after Boo was born, and I was tethered to the couch by way of a nursing baby day in and day out, but I love how it's more "intelligent" humor. In contrast...Beavis and Butthead, NOT intelligent humor. Half the stuff I don't understand, but that's why I have the DVDs, and the "guides to Gilmore-isms" silly!
  3. DOING LAUNDRY. This is one major idiosyncrasy about me, that most people just don't understand. When I was a young'n (so young I can't remember actually doing it) I started helping my mom fold the laundry. It started with matching socks, and then graduated to folding towels. By the time I was 9, I had been well trained in the art of sorting, and machine settings, and had earned the chore of doing all the laundry for my 7 member family. I usually didn't mind it. Granted, I prefer doing it now that I got to pick my own washer/dryer/and laundry soaps, but it's always made me happy. I tell myself that it's because I'm serving my family, and blah blah blah, when in reality I think it's because I'm lazy, and would rather let a machine do the work. Admit it. Isn't there something so thrilling about putting dirty clothes into a machine, adding a few soaps and whatnot (I always pretreat before it goes in the hamper), and then letting the machine do all the work? No? It's just me? Alrighty then! It sure beats banging your clothes on a rock...that's all I'm sayin'!
  4. WRITING SONG PARODIES. I have such a simple sense of humor. So, sometimes to amuse myself, I will start singing a song, but change it to accomodate the members of my family, or group that I am in. For example: When I was younger, (older than 12, younger than 16) we were going on a church trip. My sister had brought along her Boys 2 Men CD, and wanted to play it (maybe it was a tape...can't remember exactly). My mom heard the words "I'll make love to you", and deemed it inappropriate to listen to on a church trip. I agreed, but also found a loophole. What if we changed the words to make it appropriate? I don't think my mom thought we could do it, but the song ended up going a little something like this: "I'll make love to you, on our HONEYMOON, on a BIG FAT CRUISE to the TROPIC OF CANCER..." So on and so forth. Like I said...simple sense of humor.
  5. GOING TO CONCERTS. I had never been to a concert until after I was married, but in the last 3 years, we have been to 3 concerts (Kenny Chesney, Rascal Flatts, Brad Paisley) and we are currently anxiously awaiting April 10th to come around, when we will see BON JOVI! WOO HOO!

Alright, well, 5 things took WAAAYYY longer than I thought they would, so I think I'll call that good for now. I'm sure you'll find out more about me than you ever cared to know if you read my blog regularly. At least on the 12th of each month!

Have a great Friday everyone!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Help! I'm Lost! I Don't Know Where I Am!

So this morning, we awoke to a peculiar sight. Being from Texas, Boo having never lived anywhere else, this is not something we are accustomed to.


Lots and lots of the fluffy white stuff. Not hail, not sleet, but ACTUAL SNOW!!! About 4 inches of it so far, and there is more to come. School was not cancelled, which frankly shocked the bajeebers out of me, but since we live less than a mile from the school, I didn't really care.

Now, for all of you who are from up north, or from the mountain states, I'm giving you fair warning...prepare for a collective eye roll...NOW!

Here is the view of the front of our house. I would have blanked out the house number, but I figure, you're probably not going to try to track me down and hurt me...right?

This is the view from standing on the front porch, looking out. HOLY COW, RIGHT? No? Still not impressed? Yeah, really nothing compared to the feet of snow everyone else is getting, but this is the first accumulation we have had since moving here. That's right, people 3 1/2 years...and we finally get our first real snowfall!

The view of my street. It's beginning to look a lot like...Valentine's day?

A family tradition growing up (in Ohio, where we got snow) was to listen to "Suzy Snowflake" by Rosemary Clooney right after the first snowfall. I got to play that for the first time for most of my children. I don't think they were impressed, but dangit, I was ecstatic! Yay SNOW!


P.S. Blogger is being kind of lame, so I'm sorry if the text is all kinds of screwed up...I really tried.

Dear Someone

This is the first time I am linking up with Shortmama for the Dear someone letters. I am so excited! After you read mine, go check out some more Dear letters!

Dear Helpful school aide person,

While I was not there on Monday to witness
"the event", I wanted to take a moment and
thank you for supplying me with my WTF
moment this week when I link up again, with MiMi.
If not for you, I may have had to think for a whole
3 minutes to come up with something from my past.
Really? Not even a Sorry?

Dear Roon,

I love that while we were making the shopping list this week,
you kept saying "floss" every time I said there was something
we were forgetting. I knew that there was something bathroom
related that we were in need of, but you kept breaking my train of
thought, and saying "floss". Thank you so much for that, because
when Monday came, and I was out of DEODORANT,
the floss really came in handy.
Bet you regretted it when you came to bed that night to a stinky wife!

Dear Boo,
I wish I could understand you, child! Here it is FREEZING
and you would prefer to walk around without any more on your
little body than a diaper. I'm cold just looking at you, but no matter
how many times I chase you down and wrestle the clothing back onto
you, you take it off, and exclaim "Look a me! Look a Me, Mommy!"
Whatever, as long as you're happy and comfortable...who am I to judge?
My skin would be purple if I ran around like that!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

UPC: February Edition.

I am so excited about this month's Unfinished Project Closet project! I can't go into too much detail, because I am actually going to link up with Xazmin at the end of the month for her Mod Podge Mania, but I will tell you that it is a project I have been talking about doing since shortly after (or maybe a year after) moving into our house. We have lived here for 3 1/2 years, and I HATE my mantle. I LOVED what I did with it over Christmas, but I despise the way that it looks throughout the rest of the year. Now, obviously this project has not been sitting around in my closet, because it's extremely large, but it has been stored in the confines of my brain long enough that I think it's beginning to gather dust. So, be sure to check back with me on February 28th, when I link up, and reveal what I did (with Mod Podge) to make my mantle everthing I want it to be.

This, is what it currently looks like. Yes, those are Mod Podged blocks that my sister in law made for me, and I LOVE those, but I think I may have a better spot fot those, or that they may look better on the mantle once my project is done. Wish me luck! Now it's time to go get sticky!

Oh! And just in case you were is what I did with it at Christmas time:

Tuesday, February 9, 2010


If you were like me, and had predicted that Ali would be the last girl standing, I submit that we weren't the only ones. Clever editing aside, Ali just seems like the All-American girl, that would be perfect to bring home to mommy. I feel like Jake agreed. Lady, Lady's husband, and I all made this prediction from the very beginning, and were obviously WRONG. Here are a few predictions I am making for the remainder of the season, that will probably miss the mark as well.

  1. Jake will pick Vienna. [Gasp!] Why do I think this? Well, because the producers/editors have spent so much time and energy making her out to be the villain, which would undoubtedly make the final rose ceremony that much more dramatic.
  2. Upon seeing all the footage of herself sans cosmetics, Vienna will develop a line of completely waterproof or permanent makeup so that she's never caught "naked" again.
  3. Gia will leave "broken hearted", find a new career in the adult film industry, and will make news when her stepbrother "tracks Jake down and breaks some legs."
  4. Tenley will be the next Bachelorette, leaving Lady and I with a new drinking (Dr. Pepper)game of taking a sip every time she squeaks.
  5. The phone call from Ali that was made out to look like a major turning point in the show will turn out to go as follows: "Hi Jake, this is Ali. Have you seen my lip balm? By the way...don't pick Vienna."
  6. Gia's mother will show up at the "women tell all" episode hopped up on whatever prescription medication she is hooked on, and will demand to know why she was not asked for Gia's hand in marriage.
  7. All the single women of the world will come to the obvious conclusion that the one thing missing from their "happily ever after" fairytale is a railing. Making them a fixture in landscapes of all varieties. After all, how can one go on a proper date, if your potential mate has nothing to hang over when overcome with emotion?
  8. Nothing more will ever be mentioned about the fact that Vienna was married before. Am I the only one that missed this little detail?!
  9. At least one of the girls will forget or mispronounce the name of the island they are traveling to for the overnight dates. It's St. Lucia, just in case you missed it.
  10. All the ladies will opt to spend the night in the fantasy suite, with Vienna being the one to partake in the now iconic "couple's massage" that will undoubtedly result in the inappropriate camera angles we have become so accustomed to.

I hope you'll all tune in with me to see which of these predictions go down in flames. If not, don't worry, I'll keep you posted. You're welcome!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Super Bowl XLIV

I am in mourning. Tonight, my beloved Colts lost to the Saints. I don't particularly have a problem with the Saints, in fact, if the Colts had to lose, I'm glad that it was to a team such as the Saints, that isn't full of a bunch of pompus, ego driven, muscle heads. Mainly, I began liking the Colts once I developed an almost unnatural crush on Peyton Manning. This is no secret to my husband, or to my children for that matter. They often refer to him as "mom's boyfriend", and when they do, a video montage begins to play in my head with Peyton running towards me on a beach, while "Love is a many splendid thing" swells in the background. Okay...maybe that's a bit of a stretch. I do think he's a good guy though. And the commercial he made for "The United Way" as he was hosting SNL makes me laugh every time I watch it.
One of the reasons to watch the Superbowl (the ONLY reason to watch it according to some people) is the commercials. There were several ads that I thought were clever, the one with Betty White made my top 5, but in my opinion the Taco Bell commercial was my absolute favorite. I am not entirely sure why. Something about Charles Barkley (Yeah that's right, I know his name...even if it's because my husband told me) trying to rap, made me laugh so hard I may be able to cut out some of my exercise routine in the morning. Or not. Watching this over and over again has been lessening the sting of the loss, so here it is just in case you are in mourning too. Enjoy! If you don't like it, or don't find it as hilarious as I do...please don't tell me. I have deluded myself into believing that I am a witty girl with a clear grasp for all things funny. I'd hate to find out that I am, in fact, lame.

<a href="" target="_new" title="Taco Bell: $5 Buck Box">Video: Taco Bell: $5 Buck Box</a>
I totally think IT ROCKS! Kinda like Dr. Seuss got stuck in a 2 Pac video...

Friday, February 5, 2010

Birthdays and T.P.

Hey Everyone! It's Friday, and you know what that means! You get to hear me COMPLAIN! I feel like I've been doing that a lot lately, but I guess since on Fridays I link up with MiMi for her Friday assignment, this could count more as creative writing than just general complaining right? Anybody? Just roll we me, okay...
So, yesterday I solved a mystery. Do you ever buy something, anything, and it seems like you are just burning through it, and it doesn't make sense? Like toothpaste, or toilet paper? Well, in our house lately, it has been toilet paper. I would expect us to burn through it at a fairly steady pace since 5/6 of the members of the household are currently potty-trained, but it just seemed to be disappearing. At first, I thought it had something to do with the fact that Roon had recently had a sit down with Bubble about his hygiene. Bubble is 5 1/2 and has not always "kept the cleanest shop" if you know what I mean. More than just a laundry issue, taking me on a daily mission through skid row, we were worried that he would end up "that" kid in class that reaks, and therefore has no friends. Roon gave him a brief tutorial on how to tell if you're clean, and we saw an immediate improvement. However, the amount of T.P. we were going through just didn't make sense. It wasn't until yesterday, when Bug needed to go potty that we realized what was going on.
Bug: "Daddy, I meed more toywet paper!"
Roon: "What are you talking about, there is half a roll on there."
Bug: "But I meed more! I meed BIG toywet paper!"
Roon: "What the heck, Bug, just use what's there. There is plenty."
Bug: (crying) "But I meed BIG toywet paper!"
Roon walks away, and apparently Bug makes do with what he has on hand.
Fast forward to later, when I was the lucky one to walk by the bathroom.
Bug: "Mommy, I meed more toywet paper!"
Me: (seeing that the roll is empty now) "Okay, I'll be right back."
When I come back in...I realize for the first time that there is a lack of a distinct odor. So, I look in the toilet, because that is part of the glamour of being a mom, ya know. Not only was the smell missing, but so was any evidence as to why a little boy would need toilet paper. WTF! Not only that, but there was about a quarter of a roll of toilet paper in the throne. Double WTF!
No wonder we've gone through about a third of a Costco size package of toilet paper in a week! I decided to try my hand at giving the boy a talking to.
Me: "Bug, boys don't need to wipe their bums when they go pee."
Bug: "Yes they do."
Me: "No. They don't. Only girls do. If you keep going through toilet paper as fast as you have been, mommy and daddy are not going to have money for other things."
Bug: (Confused look on his face. I could see this wasn't sinking in.)
Me: "If mommy and daddy need to keep buying toilet paper as much as we have had to because you've been wasting it, we won't be able to buy you birthday presents, and you will have to get toilet paper instead of toys. Do you want toilet paper or toys for your birthday?"
Bug: "Toys."
Me: "Okay, then you have to stop wasting toilet paper, okay?"
Bug: "Otay."
I guess Roon gets to have the hygiene talk again, only in reverse, for Bug. Why does it always have to be all or nothing with boys? I'll never understand...

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Free and...Easy?

I think I must be doing it wrong. "It" being Freecycle. You see, one of my "resolutibilities" that I plan to formally introduce in the next month or so, is to declutter and organize my house. Although I am a super unmotivated person, I knew that it would be dang near impossible a little difficult to get it all done in one I'm cheating. I have started the process, which I will introduce in a different post someday, of organizing my house and forming routines for my housework. So far, I'm having great results, and my husband is more than happy to see this change in me. Not that he loved me any less before, but I think he appreciates not having to dig through piles of junk to find what he's looking for. The problem is, that I realized that my "baby" Boo is not so much a baby anymore, and that because of this, and the fact that she is our last baby (barring any 1 in 400 miracles) I have quite the surplus of baby stuff. Now, most of it I can ship off to my siblings who are still multiplying like rabbits of the childbearing age, but there are some of the "larger" baby items that just don't make sense to ship. You know, carseats, jumparoos, swings, all those things that came in pieces, but are now gigantic space wasters in your home. So, I had the stupid BRILLIANT idea to try to give them away via "Freecycle". Silly me thought that if you are shouting from the rooftops "Hey, over here! I've got FREE stuff!" there would be a line of people wanting it. Boy was I wrong. I signed up on the site about 3 days ago. Just this morning, I got an email asking me to confirm my zip code and city before they could complete my registration. I did, and then a few hours later my membership was approved! YAY ME! Time to PURGE! I read through all the gobbledy gook about privacy, safety, how to post things, (Because I've always heard you need to read the fine print, so I did) and once I was done I clicked on the link in the email that said "send message" or "post item"...not too sure on that, but I do know it was the right thing to click.
Or not...Oh, it pulled it up just fine, and I proceeded to spend the next 10 minutes carefully wording a listing with specifications of one of my items.
And send...
Exactly 8 seconds after hitting send I get a delivery failure notice. Tried this again, with the same result. problem. I'll just go to the Freecycle website and try to submit it that way. Well, apparently, according to the website, I do not belong to any groups, so I can't post stuff. I spent the next 30-45 minutes arguing with the links in the email, and trying to find what I could do to post this blingin' thing, when I came across an add on CraigsList for the same exact item I was trying to unload. Well heck fire! I had had enough. I abandoned my efforts to give away some of my baby stuff, and instead made a listing for some things on the newsletter that they hand out at my husband's company. Because, while I don't like to exploit people, if I can make $25 on something versus giving something away for free, I will most likely opt to make some quick money. Wouldn't you? I figure, if it doesn't sell, we can always try Freecycle again, but once you give it away, it's gone. Who knew giving something away would be harder than selling it? Not me!

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Tag! You're it!

I'm actually pretty excited about this! I have officially been tagged by someone that I do not know in real life, but I'm so glad to know her via blogs and email. CJ at "Simply Simonsons" tagged me for this challenge. Here goes:

4 shows I like to watch:
  • The Bachelor(ette)...obviously
  • 24
  • Lost
  • Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice (they can count as one right?)

4 things I am passionate about:

  • Lately...doughnuts. Totally cancels my workout, but sometimes I just don't care.
  • Collecting Box Tops for Education. Yes, I know they're only 10 cents a piece, but so far I have single handedly raised like $100 for my school doing it. You don't want 'em, send 'em my's free money y'all!
  • Voting/Taking surveys. I vote in every election I know about, and research the facts so I'm informed, and I actively participate in a survey panel for "Knowledge Networks". I love feeling like my opinion matters.
  • Linen Closets. Not even my husband is allowed to put things away in there. IT'S MY TURF!

4 phrases I say a lot:

  • "No Ma'am!" (Usually to Boo)
  • "It's true." (I blame my Brother in Law)
  • "Friggin A" (No, this is not a substitution for the real words. I actually do say this...)
  • "Smooth move, Exlax"

4 things I have learned:

  • Money can make you comfortable, but it can't make you happy.
  • Some recipes are only meant to be photographed.
  • If you want to know who your true friends are...have a crisis.
  • Don't judge parents based on a snapshot into their day. Chances are, you are not seeing the whole picture.

4 places I would like to go:

  • Australia
  • An amusement park (sans children)
  • A spa for the weekend
  • A Disney Cruise (Fun for the whole family!)

4 things I did yesterday:

  • Talked with my sister in law on the phone.
  • Signed up for FreeCycle (time to purge some of this STUFF!)
  • 2 loads of laudry (still trying to get caught up from my week long hiatus aka head cold)
  • Watched the Bachelor

4 things I'm looking forward to:

  • Getting our debt paid off.
  • Our 10 year anniversary trip (even if it will come 8+ months late.)
  • My little brother moving closer to us.
  • Getting my house organized.

4 things I love about winter:

  • Snuggling under the covers to watch a movie with Roon.
  • Baking without overheating the house.
  • Folding warm clothes straight out of the dryer (Sounds like a chore, but it's one of my favorite things in the wintertime.)
  • Making and eating soup.

4 things on my wish list:

  • A new refrigerator. (there's nothing wrong with our current one, but it was only meant to be "temporary". Going on 4 years now...time to let it go.)
  • More time in the day.
  • An organizational system for my closet.
  • A large caffeinated beverage (this is always on my wish list by way of Dr. Pepper)

4 People I tag:

Well, since I only have two followers, and only about 4 people read my blog...consider yourselves tagged. Unless you don't want to. I would love to hear your answers though!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Hello Pot...This is Kettle. You're Black.

Although it is Tuesday morning, my creativity is at an all time low. Last night's episode of the Bachelor was totally unremarkable to me, and my house smells like Apple Cider Vinegar. Why, you ask, does my house smell of Apple Cider Vinegar? Well, I'll tell you. Because Boo enjoys "cooking" in my pantry. Usually this just involves pulling out my collanders, and various cans and bottles, and then proceeding to "cook" with them. As I choose to pick my battles, and since she has never done any harm, I let her do it. This morning, Roon was getting the children breakfast while I did my 30 minute workout. As Roon was leaving, he informs me that Boo got ahold of a glass bottle of vinegar, and dropped it. Yeah, we NEVER use it, so the bottle had to be dang near full. So, I get to spend the remainder of my day, or however long it will take that smell to dissipate, gagging on the smell of vinegar. Yay! The good thing about this is, that Boo gave me my one and only idea on how to analyze the show last night. You see, her "cooking" got me to thinking about pots, pans, and kettles.
Let us think back for a minute about Jake's stint on The Bachelorette, and how it drove him absolutely crazy that everyone kept calling him the "good guy". He was even sent home the week before the "hometown" dates, for this very reason. He was all "woe is me" and " I guess nice guys finish last...story of my life" and then when he gets the chance, he morphs into Jillian, channels his inner horndog, and cuts the virgin (or "good girl") loose at the rose ceremony right before the hometown dates. I think it is no coincidence that he cut her the very week he found out she was saving herself for marriage. I guess you could argue that he really didn't have much of a connection with Corrie to begin with, and their "relationship" was a little slower to develop, but I'm not convinced that his "copilot" didn't have any say in the matter. On one hand, you have Vienna who will try to crawl into bed with you, and try to get it on whilest Gia waits in the wings. You're pretty much guaranteed some tantric lovin' as long as you keep her around long enough for the fantasy dates. Right? On the other hand, you have Corrie, who you know is not going to give it up until she's married. (Right on, girl! We are a rare breed, but prove it can be done!) Who do you think this MAN is going to pick? The trend in Bachelor(ette) history, is that nobody turns down the fantasy suite. At least, not that I can remember, but feel free to correct me on that one. After all, that wouldn't make for good skanky TV would it?
I wonder how Jake feels about Jillian's decision now that he has been deemed "the pot".

Monday, February 1, 2010

February Resolutibility

First, I have got to say, where the heck did January go? It seems like I had just gotten used to the idea of my January RESOLUTIBILITY and now it's time to fess up as to how incredibly terrible awesome I did at it. As a reminder, I decided to exercise for January with my own personal trainer also known as annoying virtual workout girl on WiiFit. Well, Roon and I both did this for a couple weeks, then decided to give the Wii Active another shot. They have a 30 day challenge on there, and we figured...why not? We did that for 5 days, and then both came down with horrific head colds, that wiped us out to the point where I was barely even blogging we're better now, after a week long hiatus of sorts, and we jumped back on the exercise bandwagon this morning. I enjoy doing it, it seems to make my day go smoother, when we're up and active before the kids get up for school, but that in no way means I enjoy getting out of my nice warm bed at 6 am. Obviously, this goal is still a work in progress, so I will update you on that as I feel so inclined.
For February, I actually have a lot of resolutibilities that I was debating using. I have been in the midst of starting 3 of them for the last couple of weeks, but decided that since February is the shortest month of the year, I should opt to do something that is guaranteed to be easy as pie. So, my resolutibility for February is: Flossing. Gross, I know, and probably too much information, but I have not always been the most consistant with flossing. I brush. I brush often. I brush regularly, but I have definitely been known to fall asleep at night without doing a proper bedtime routine, and I have the fillings to prove it. I think in the past, it's always been too easy for me to abandon this habit. I will get really good at the routine, and then I will have to go in and have my teeth cleaned, or a filling done, and my gums will be so tender for a day afterwards, that I will "give my gums a break" and fall out of the habit. Or, we'll run out of floss. Something that totally justifies spending $1,000.00 on a root canal, you know.
So there you have it...on my quest to be a more well rounded person, I am going to continue to exercise, and make my mouth healthier. Plus, I'm dragging my husband along for the ride.