I is for Idiot.

Today, I am linking up with my gal pal Myya over at Myya Says for her "Stick your foot in your mouth, Monday."  After you read mine, you should head on over to read hers, and maybe take a minute to link up with her as well.  I promise, we'll only laugh WITH you.  Not AT you. 

So, this story takes me all the way back to high school.  I graduated high school in 1999, from a high school in Utah.  However, to understand this story completely, you must know that I completed the majority of my schooling in a little farm community in Ohio.  My Freshman and Sophomore years of high school were in this little community.  For several reasons, which included my parent's divorce, my grades slipped once I reached high school.  Like, I'd be lucky to get into a community college kind of slipped.  Once the divorce was final, my mom moved our family out to Utah, the summer after my Sophomore year.  Immediately, my grades improved.  I excelled in English, and brought my GPA up dramatically. 

In the final weeks of my Senior year, I received a letter, informing me that I would be receiving an award or scholarship at the upcoming awards ceremony.  I was psyched!  Unfortunately, the wind was let out of my sails, when at the award ceremony, I was one of several people to receive the award "most improved grades".  Some people may have found this to be a great honor.  I was not some people. 

Later in the day, after the award ceremony, I sat in my Medical Terminology class where a friend of mine asked about my prestigious award.  It was then, that I began to rant.  "Oh, this thing?  It's basically an insulting piece of paper, that says that hey, at least you're not as stupid as you used to be.  I'm still too stupid to get a scholarship, or any kind of award indicating I'm smart, so they had to invent an award to give me."  I was basking in the hilarity that was my make believe prize, when I realized that one of the guys in my class had also been the recipient of the same award.  When he had walked into class, he was carrying his certificate with is head held high, and a smile on his face.  However, when I turned around to hear the conversation he was having with his girlfriend (a friend of mine), his demeaner had changed.  He was now sullen, and he had folded his certificate up, and was telling her that it didn't mean he wasn't dumb, just not as dumb as he used to be. 
I felt HORRIBLE!!!  I felt about as tall as Stuart Little, and immediately wished I could take back what I had said.  I apologized to him, and told him that I'm sure that his grades had improved more than mine, so the award probably meant more for him.  It was too late though.  I had already tarnished his view of the award. 
This is exactly why I shouldn't rant.  I'm much less aware of my surroundings when I do. 

Go ahead, try to beat that one!

On an unrelated note, have you entered my QUINCE QUOTE giveaway yet?  If not, what are you waiting for?!  So far, I only have 2 people entered.  Contest ends, tomorrow at midnight.  HOP TO IT!!!

ALMOST Diez y Seis Quote!

I know it, I can admit that I am a loser.  I told you all that this would be up by 8:00 central time, and it is now 10:50, but I maintain that is is 8:00 somewhere, so there you go!  First, a couple of pictures, to entice you to enter this time. 

Here is a wide shot, of everything there is to offer.  The DVD she guessed the info for, a couple packages of microwave popcorn, PLUS 3 kinds of candy, all neatly arranged in a completely personalized ETCHED GLASS bowl!  Now, who wouldn't want that?! 

A close up shot of the bowl.  It has her last name (yeah, I know, I kinda screwed it up, but I'm getting better) and it says "Movie night.  Now it's a party!" on it.  Best part?  Since it is etched into the bowl...it is DISHWASHER SAFE!!!  So come on people!  Let's see if we can't get more than 3 people to enter this time, shall we!

Alright...so here's the quote.

"He's a real gentleman.  I bet he takes the dishes out of the sink, before he pees in it."

Here are your chances to win:

1. BLOG ABOUT THIS GIVEAWAY.  This is a way you can win, even if you have no idea where this quote came from.  Doesn't even have to be a blog totally devoted to this, just a blurb...any blurb will do!
2. TELL WHAT MOVIE THE QUOTE CAME FROM.
3. TELL WHAT CHARACTER DELIVERED THE QUOTE.
4. NAME THE ACTOR/ACTRESS WHO PLAYED THE CHARACTER
5. TELL THE LINE DELIVERED IMMEDIATELY BEFORE OR AFTER QUOTE WAS DELIVERED.
6. NAME ANOTHER QUOTE FROM THE SAME MOVIE.  If you make me laugh, I will throw in an extra entry for you.

Sounds simple enough, right? 

So, I will keep this open until midnight on the 20th, and will announce the winner sometime during the day on the 21st.  Good luck!

How The Grinch Stole Texas Pride Day

So many things today!

First...QUINCE QUOTE! No, this is not the post about this month's contest, but be looking for it later today. I have the movie all picked, and the quote as well, but I am desperately hoping that Heather will send me a picture of the goodies she received last month, so I may include it in the post later on today. Why? Because I think that if you saw the awesomeness that was her prize, more of you may be urged, bribed, or enticed into entering. I should, have the post up by 8:00 pm, central time. Are you chomping at the bit?

Second, Mamarazzi is hosting an awesome giveaway for a $25 gift card from Target. There are opportunities for up to 25 entries, and dangit, I'm gonna take advantage of every one! Now, my mom works for Walmart, so I'm not supposed to say this, but I love me some Target goodness! On the other hand, if my mom is reading this...HELP! My blog account has been hijacked by some Target loving freak! Hopefully that will do. Just so long as I don't mention that I also love Twix candybars...OOPS! I did it again! Sorry, Mommy! So, yeah, if you love yourself some Target too, head on over HERE and compete against me. Hmmm, that kinda sounds like a bad thing.

Now...my story.

Do you ever feel like your life is imitating a movie? Yesterday, I had such an experience, which would have made for a really funny situation, had I been in a better mood, but alas, I was not. In my case, I may have been feeling like the "Grinch" but I was not doing bad things. In fact, I was operating under the blessing and direction of the Mayor of Whoville (Sissy's teacher) when I was volunteering at the school yesterday.
Taking down the bulletin board, that had proudly displayed all the things made for their Texas Pride Day open house, I was less "stealing their Christmas" and more "taking down their Christmas decorations in July". Of course, not everyone saw it that way.
"Little CindyLou" appeared, just like in the movie, most likely while my bum was straight up in the air trying to reach a low lying armadillo. "Are you taking that down?" she asked with all the innocence and wide eyes that only a child can muster.
It took all the self restraint I could muster to not let my grinchy attitude morph into a bit out of a Bill Engvall routine.
I simply said "Yes" instead of saying what I really wanted to say, which was "why, no, my dear. I was just putting UP blank wall, and ran out!" Here's your sign.
Now, for your viewing pleasure...

Happy Thursday, Everyone!

The Road to Skinny Jeans, is Paved With Country Crock.

It's Wednesday, so you must know that means I am linking up with ShortMama over at Family of Shorts for her fat to fit journey known as "Journey from Muffin Top to Skinny Jeans".

This week's assignment? To update you on our progress from the goals we set last week, and then to outline our goals from our starting point, to where we want to be.

To say that I slipped up this week, would only be about the biggest understatement of the year. First, I slipped, then I slid, then momentum picked up as I did a full on "Wesley" roll down the hill of progress (As You Wiiiish!!!). That's one slippery slope, that is for dang sure! I could give a million excuses as to why I did not do perfectly on my first week, but instead, I'm just going to say, that I was doing really well for about 3 days, and then the weekend came. I failed at my "increase activity" goal, which made me more likely to snack...just like I knew it would. I realized that I not only need to quit bad habits and start good ones, but I also need to set up "cheats" for myself. Little indulgences, that I have deemed "okay" so I can "slip up" without the guilt, that will inevitably make me throw my hands up in the air and say "I quit". That is my next step. Hopefully, by next week, I will be able to tell you what my "cheats" will be.

We were supposed to weigh ourselves, and come to terms with the weight that we are right now. Well, I haven't weighed myself since Friday, but I can tell you, that for the last 4 months, I have been weighing myself 4-5 times a week (thanks to my Wii) and it has always shown the same basic number. I will not share that number with you, but I will tell you, that it contains an 8, a 1, and a 6. If any of you smart alecs tell me I look like I weigh 816 pounds, I may slug you, so don't go there! According to BMI (Body Mass Index) I need to lose about 45 pounds, in order to no longer be considered "overweight". However, if I lost that much, because of how tall I am, (5' 8") I worry that I may look unhealthy. So, instead, I am not going to focus on the number on the scale, or my BMI, and instead focus on measurements, and how my clothes fit. I would like to lose inches in my hips, thighs, and waist...and maybe even tone up my old lady arms. After all, I look like I'm trying to take flight when I fold sheets. It's just embarrassing!

I will continue to preplan my lunches, and get back on the breakfast train, and pick up the pace with exercise for sure. If anyone has any ideas for some decadent treats, that would not erase a days worth of progress, please channel them my way...I can use all the help I can get!

The Idiosyncrasies of Me.

Like normal, I had planned to do a post yesterday (the 12th) about me. However, I had so much fun basking in the awesomness that was my birth, that it was neglected. So, I will make it up to you now, with a belated, but well worth the wait post on the things that make me odd unique. But first, I have to ask a couple of questions that have nothing to do with this post.

1. Does anyone out there have a natural (or not so natural) remedy for coughing? I seriously did not fall asleep this morning until 6:30, because my abs decided they neeeded a little cough-crunch workout. Seriously, any advice that does NOT include alcoholic beverages would be appreciated. I'm a desperate woman! You saw the pictures yesterday, and if there's one thing I cannot do without, it's my beauty sleep. That could be scary!
2. What is it about mom's birthday/mother's day, that makes it the perfect time for the kids to act like little mutant people? I believe I have cracked the code! You see, every year, my kids ask me what I want for both of these occasions. I naively request one of two things. "Peace and quiet" or "for my kids to get along all day". Apparently children only speak in opposites. This is why for Mother's Day, I'm asking for nothing but noise, and fighting, all day long. I'll let you know how it turns out...

Now, onto the things about me, that I think are perfectly sane, but other people have pointed out to be odd.

1. I am super particular about the way my clothes are folded, and how my linen closets are organized. Seriously. Like, anal about it. My mother in law came to help out after one of the boys was born, and she insisted on helping with my laundry. My mom was there for a while, but who do you think I learned how to fold laundry from? Yeah, my mom is allowed to fold my laundry. Anyway, my MIL folded my clothes, and I burst into tears and had to leave the room. I couldn't watch. You could say it was hormonal, and it would probably make me look less crazy if I claimed that it was, but really, I think it would effect me the same way now, sans postpartum hormones. I'm just picky like that. Had to refold everything before I could put it away. It may be hidden in a drawer, but I would still know...
2. I am afraid of birds. Not just cautious...AFRAID. Even the little ones who are meant to be pets. I'm pretty sure, that every bird is really out to get me, and all I see when I look at one, is an evil little creature just waiting for the perfect opportunity to peck my eyes out. Overreacting? Possibly. But I did see "The Birds" when I was a kid (most likely against my parent's wishes) and it has muddied my impression of the fair fowl. Seriously. My kids even shoo ducks away from me at the park. They may have blunt beaks, but I'm sure they'd find a way...
3. I have to eat M&M's in order. This started when my older sister made an out of the blue comment one day about how she had heard that if you eat your green M&M's last, it would bring good luck. From there, I developed a very particular order (which makes perfect sense in my head) that they have to be eaten. For this reason, I can't eat them in the dark. If I can't see them, I might eat them out of order. What's the order? Well, it's brown, orange, yellow, blue, red, then green of course! I improvise for seasonal M&M's, but even Christmas M&M's get eaten all red, then all green. Awesome, right?!
4. I can't look in a mirror in the dark. If I have to walk by one, I put my hand up like a shade to guard my eyes. Why? Because when I was young, my Grandma told me that one day she would teach me how to look in a mirror (in the dark of course) and see all your past lives. It had to be done very specifically, apparently, and so I've always been afraid I would do it accidentally, and see something scary. While I'm an adult now, and know that I don't believe in that kind of thing, I am still afraid I will see an old indian man like my Grandma claimed she had seen before. There are some things you just can't UN see, you know what I mean?
5. I can't stand to have anything touch my feet immediately following a shower or bath. If I shower at night, I can't even stand to have my sheets touch my feet. For this reason, I will almost always wear socks to bed. But wait! Aren't socks touching your feet? Why, yes, they are! That's what makes it odd. As long as it's touching me uniformly (like a second skin) it's okay, but if it's not touching my feet equal amounts all over, it's like fingernails on a chalkboard. Ugh, gives me chills, just thinking about it!

I'm sure there are more, but I think I need to maintain some sort of illusion that I am a "normal" person, so I will leave it at that. Go ahead and judge them. I already know they are totally irrational, but they are things that definitely set me apart from average everyday people. Would't you say?

Just a reminder, that it is the 13th, so guess what happens in 2 days...

QUINCE QUOTE! Be looking for it...

NOT Just Another Manic Monday

Today has been an absolute fantabulous day! Today is my birthday, and I have been overwhelmed by awesomeness. Besides the fact that my allergies seem to have morphed into some sort of mutant cold thing, this day has been absolutely perfect! Roon took the entire day off, instead of the half day he was planning on, since I'm under the weather, which means that I have had no parental responsibilities that I didn't want to have today. Diapers? I DON'T THINK SO!!! Roon took me out to lunch (of course we had Bug and Boo in tow) and when we got home I had not 1, but 2 packages of birthday awesomeness waiting on my doorstep. I got a birthday present from my dad (an awesome rice steamer, that I plan to use, as soon as I have rice that isn't instant in the house. I know, I'm totally lame to still use instant rice...but dangit, it's easy!) and my spring swap package from the awesome and fantastic Mamarazzi!

Here is my package of spring goodness! (Yes, the card says "Sami". Once my blog redesign is done, it will be what I go by, because it is my (nick)name. People were starting to think my parents were hippies, or something, naming me "Symply" so I've decided to change it. Hope this doesn't blow your mind too bad!) I realized after I opened it, that I should probably wait to open the contents after the kids woke up/got home from school, so I had to wait a whole 30 minutes. Restraint, I tell ya...

First there was a note, explaining her view on spring. I love that it was handwritten! My handwriting is pretty much illegible, so I never handwrite anything. A very nice touch, I do think!

Each gift had a litttle card attached. The outside of the card said "Spring is" and the inside, gave a short explanation of what the item made her think of about spring. Here's what I got...

SPRING IS...

...Sidewalk games in the sunshine!

(Please ignore the narly look on my face. I was reacting to the kids absolute jubilation, at the sight of this 3D sidewalk chalk!)

...For playing outside, and enjoying the longer days with the kids!

(Roon had a great time trying to teach the kids how to play with these Jacks. I think it was mostly because it had been so long since either of us had played them...)

...When baseball season begins...this means ballpark food!

This was a package of Cracker Jacks. I love Cracker Jacks, especially at a baseball game! I don't have a picture of this unwrapped, because while editing the pictures, we realized the Bug wasn't wearing any pants. No underpants either. He was going commando, and showing all you bloggy friends his business. In an effort to keep this a G rated blog, I opted to keep his junk private.

You are welcome.

...allergy and cold season (ain't that the truth!) This will help keep the germies away.
(all the kids just HAD to smell the vanilla scented hand sanitizer. Perfect size for the purse, and since they like the way it smells, maybe they won't fight me about using it!)

...when our little friends come out of hibernation, and fill the night w/ their songs.
These are the most adorable little frog figurines! My kids were fascinated with them, which means they will earn a prime spot in the china cabinet, until my kids are old enough not to break them.

...for spring cleaning. These will make it a breeze!

Why another narly face?! I'm trying to look surprised, and it kinda came off looking dorky. You see, I sent Mamarazzi some of these too! Great minds think alike...or so I've been told!

...when we start getting ready for swim suit season-YIKES!

Boy...I'LL SAY! I've always wanted to try these special K bars, but worried they would taste like "diet food". I haven't tried them yet, but they sure don't look like diet food!

There were two more packages, whose pictures were deleted due to partial nudity. Their clues were:

...for getting down and dirty, so pretty things can grow!

(This was a pair of gardening gloves, and some flower seeds, which I very much needed. I just hope I don't kill 'em! I have a special talent for that...)

... when those little surprises pop up in our yard.

This was the cutest little garden sign that says "I don't remember planting this". Too true in my "garden"! The only things that live, are the weeds!

And finally, here's a shot of everything all together.

Totally awesome, if I do say so myself!

Thanks so much Mamarazzi for being a fantastic swap partner, and awesome bloggy friend for life! If you want to see what I sent her, head on over here.

To check in with the rest of the spring swappy group, and blog jog to see who got what from whom...go visit ShortMama here. Thanks so much for hosting! You rock the block!

Oh! And how old am I? If you promise not to laugh, I'll tell you that I am 29 today. People are usually shocked to hear how "young" I am, because I act older apparently. I think you can tell from my blog, that I am most definitely NOT a grown up. Here's to the best year in my twenties yet!

So Many Things...So Little Time.

Buckle your seat belts, folks! It's gonna be a bumpy, and quite possibly a long and mundane ride!
Today I shipped off my package to my spring swap partner! I am so excited for her to get it, even though my husband has informed me on several occasions that I sent too much. I couldn't help it, I'm a newbie at this, and would rather overdo than underdo. Anyway, be checking back next week to see what I get from her. I am on pins and needles!
Okay, so I originally tried to post about my first award a few days ago, but Blogger was being, shall we say, less than cooperative with me. So, I waited, and it's a good thing I did, because today I got my second award! My totally awesome new friend and couponer extraordinairre CJ over at Simply Simonsons, bestowed this honor upon me, but I unfortunately don't know the rules. So, I will say, thank you CJ! You never cease to make me laugh, and I'm sure if we ever met in real life, our husbands wouldn't be able to handle it!

Not sure how many people I'm supposed to tag for this, but I'm gonna go ahead, and say 4, because 4 is my number. So, enjoy, if your name is listed below...

MiMi -Because sometimes I think we were separated at birth.

Emmy- Not only is she awesome, but she's my zipper sister. Plus, I dig the "daughter with boy name" thing. Both my girls have it, I'm just sayin'...

Amber aka "Whispering Writer" over at Dirty Laundry- Because she deserves an award simply for watching Yo Gabba Gabba as much as she has to. I would lose my mind!!!

ShortMama- For being the hostess with the mostess the past few weeks, and she's inspired me to lose my muffin top. Mmmm muffins...

Now onto my other award. A few weeks ago, Jennifer awarded me this:

Isn't it lovely? Problem is, I'm supposed to pass it on to 15 people, and well, I'm so new to this, that I only have about 5 more people than those listed above, so I guess I will say, congrats girls listed up there...plus

Myya, CJ, Mamarazzi, Xazmin, Brooks, and Heather. I know I'm leaving someone out, so if I did, and you know I would smack myself for forgetting you, please consider my wrists slapped, and grab the award. I'll repent later...

The rules for this one, is to tell 7 things about yourself. So, here it goes. I'll try to make this short and sweet.

1. My favorite colors are purple and sage green. Never much cared for pink when I was a kid. I blame it on a form of immersion therapy when my sister and I were young.
2. I never liked peanut butter and jelly sandwiches as a kid. Still only like them now, on occasion. Does this make me un American?
3. I picked out Sissy and Bubble's names when I was just a kid. I was 12 when I named Sissy, and 13 when I named Bubble. I actually wrote a letter to my future husband telling him he had to agree to them, or else not marry me. Luckily, he didn't object. Sissy's came from a book, Bubble is named after someone. (Obviously, those aren't their real names.)
4. I have what I call, a "sensitivity" to peppermint. It usually gives me a migraine. No candy canes for me, at Christmas.
5. I absolutely detest the word "panties". Always have, always will. They are underpants, and you'll never change my mind about that!
6. Sometimes I break out into song for no reason at all. They're usually made up songs, using a weird accent, or off-key tune. My kids love it, but Roon prefers when I sing "normal". That's not as fun though!
7. I was a little short of being a full on stalker obsessed with Jonathan Taylor Thomas as a "tween" (Think I actually had that 16 magazine, too. Yeah, I was a subscriber...). I even gave up eating meat for a time, partially because he was a vegetarian. No, I'm not proud of it, but come on, he was pretty hunky back in the day, right? Oh, and I also had a thing for Jonathan Jackson. Maybe it was the name, I was obsessed with...

So, there you go. 7 more things about me. Thanks so much Jennifer, for passing this on to me, and for making me feel special! You are da BOMB!!! Pretty sure, I can't pull that off...

Last item of business? BON JOVI IS TOMORROW!!! Stay tuned for pictures...