Thursday, February 17, 2011

Truth No. 1. When Art is NOT Your Forte...

Yesterday, I posted 6 things.  5 that were true, and 1 that was not true. 

Over the next few days, I will enlighten you all as to which ones were true, and the stories behind them.

Truth #1:  I once got in trouble for drawing a pornagraphic picture.

Hanging my head in shame now.

It was the 1992-1993 school year, and I was in 6th grade.  (yeah, yeah, make jokes about how young I am later, okay?)
To say that I was not good at art would have been a gross understatement. 

I HATED art class. 

I blame my mom, really.  The only class she ever got a D in was art, and I inherited her talent, or lack thereof. 

Despite the fact that I hated art class, I did like to doodle.  So, on occasion I would doodle little pictures in my notebook, and that was that.  Somehow, this ended up getting me in trouble TWICE in one year. 

The first incident occured when I doodled a cute little pig, and showed it to my friend, Missy*.  She took it, wrote a classmate's name on it, with an arrow pointing to the pig, signed our names to it, and then proceeded to hand deliver it to a heavy set girl in our class.  And I was mortified.

And I had to apologize.

Later that year, I doodled a whole scene of kids playing on a playground.  There was a boy, off to the side of the picture, waving to all of the kids playing in the distance.

Did I mention I'm seriously bad at art?

When Kip*, a boy in my class, walked by, and asked if he could have my picture, I was flattered!  I didn't understand WHY he would want it, but hey...who was I to judge?  Somebody liked my art!  Step aside, {insert some artist here}...Sami had arrived!

The wind was quickly let out of my sails when my teacher came over to me during recess to "discuss" my drawing. 

Apparently, a strategically placed "hand" can be perceived as something MUCH different in a mind that resides in the gutter. 

Instead of my perfectly innocent "Hi!  How ya doin'?!", it was viewed as a "Hiii...how you doin?" (Think Joey, from Friends).  And my doodled guy was VERY happy to see someone...

And I had to sit out the rest of recess.

But at least my explanation kept me from having to see a therapist...

Thanks a lot, Kip*!

*Names were NOT changed to protect the innocent.  Am I bitter?  I think so...

11 comments:

Mamarazzi said...

oh sure.

blame Kip.

we ALL know the truth.

you little hussy.

aubrey said...

Geez Sam. ;)

Impulsive Addict said...

You slut. That's horrible. Shame on you.

Shawn said...

That's your story and you're sticking to it!

dot dot dot

Janna said...

Although that is a funny story...I only have one thing to say...

I FEEL OLD!

:)

Emmy said...

Lol! Your last sentence, I totally figured you changed the names.

Lesson learned, Sami should not doodle ;)

mandy said...

I assumed you did this one! What can I say ... I just know ya like that!

Mhmm ... Kip ... sure!

MiMi said...

At least they were accidental porn!
I had a guy named Kip in my school. He was a jerk.

Amy said...

That is so funny. I am still seriously bad at art, but I have never doodled. I think the paper would try to burn itself if I tried. Which is sad because everyone in my family is an artist. And my husband's family. His dad is an artist for a living so I am more than slightly intimidated. :)

Lisa @ Angels Faces said...

I'm not an artist either...
and in 1992 I was 9. :)

Xazmin said...

I knew a Kip that was a jerk too!

Also...um...I bet you really were not as innocent as you claim. Just sayin'.